State of the Union

I had an idea the other day to try to get my students to watch the State of the Union address. I try to get them to pay some attention to the government and what's going on, but things like this can be tricky because if they watch at home, then I have to make them take notes or write summaries, and that adds to my grading. At the end of the semester I just don't have time for it.

So, I teamed up with our government teacher and we offered them extra credit in both of our classes for watching. Then I created Obama Bingo to keep them listening and paying attention. I wasn't sure how many would take us up on it since it was so late (2 and a half hours after school ended), long, and (to them) boring.

We had over 60 kids show up. There are only 90-something in the senior class, so 2/3 is pretty darn good! They played bingo, won some candy, and watched their government at work. At the end I had them write a sentence about what they found the most interesting/surprising/etc. I haven't read most of them yet, but it was clear that they really did listen. I'm totally thrilled!

Violence

I saw a post recently about how there are often clusters of similar studies in the news media. Lately I've been feeling like there's a cluster of violence related stories. I don't know if this is just because I'm being hyper-sensitive to them, or because there's actually been an increase lately, but either way I find it disturbing.

We're only a few weeks into 2011, but there have already been 3 school shootings, not to mention the shooting of Congresswoman Giffords in Arizona. Add to that the child abduction sign I saw on the way to school today, and the world seems like a scary place.

We had a practice lockdown drill last week, and it was more disconcerting than it was reassuring. On the one hand, it's nice to figure out our problems before we really need the protocols, but I really wish that it wasn't necessary in the first place.

The shooting at Gardena High is especially bothersome. This wasn't a disgruntled, pissed off kid showing up to mow down classmates. This was a kid who was scared for his own safety who decided to carry a gun for self protection that just accidentally went off and shot a kid in the head. That, to me, is far scarier than the pissed of loner. I can watch for pissed off kids. I can build a positive relationship with my students and watch for changes in their behavior. I can't follow them home and see what it's like once they leave campus. I don't know who is scared they'll be attacked walking home.

I had an incident with one of my freshmen the other day that was equally creepy. I don't know if he was high on something, or just has some serious ticks (autism? OCD?), but whatever was going on with the kid wasn't normal. He spent about 10 minutes in class scratching at his pants and then smelling his fingers. I took him outside to make sure everything was okay, and after taking his iPod just to make sure there wasn't anything strange going on (which there wasn't, aside from the dozen gun-related apps), he started literally bouncing in the hall chanting "i'm not crazy, i'm not crazy." As I said, not normal. It was a far too real reminder that as much as I try to keep tabs on what's going on with my students, there are always things I can't predict.

Most of the time I can forget about all the various threats posed to teachers on a daily basis. Lately there have been too many reminders.

Home cooking

My seniors have been working on a unit about fast food. I really enjoy teaching this unit, in part because it brings together two things that I really enjoy. I enjoy teaching, and I'm rather passionate about food. I like that this unit, while it's supposed to be mostly about comparing opinions and newspaper articles, editorials, etc, also serves as a bit of a soapbox for me to talk to the kids about their eating habits.

Our school switched to an organic, healthy lunch provider and we're heard nothing but complaints about the food every since. A big part of the problem is that there's no education going on about what they're actually eating. Today, as an example, they had chicken teriyaki with brown rice. Admittedly, it wasn't very good, but it was certainly edible. The problem is that the stir-fry part had bok choy in it. The kids in my school are 98% latino. They've never seen, bought, cooked, or eaten bok choy! They think it's spinach, and then when they taste it and it doesn't taste like spinach, they think it's "nasty." I'd probably have the same reaction. We had a whole conversation the other day about brown rice. These kids have grown up on rice, but it's always white rice. We give them brown rice without an explanation and they think it looks funny and isn't cooked right because it's crunchy. I took the time to explain the difference and that brown rice has a firmer texture because it still has the grain casing on it, and the whole room of kids suddenly was able to look at it in a different light. It's not like the conversation took that long, but thanks to the California state standards and other restrictions on us teachers, they've never been taught that.

I'm trying to teach my daughter better, but it's not easy. We took her to Disneyland yesterday for the first time, and I think we did okay feeding her, but it certainly wasn't perfect. I'm especially annoyed by kids' menus. Everything on it was a variation on the Starch-Cheese theme. Macaroni and Cheese. Quesadilla. Grilled Cheese sandwich. We went with the hotdog with a side of applesauce. At least there was bread, meat, and fruit. Milk to drink too. I suppose it could be worse. She loved the hotdog, but liked the applesauce better. So that's good. No Ketchup either. Lily loved Disneyland and had a wonderful time. We got a season pass, so we'll be going back. I just am going to have to be careful to make sure that we don't wind up eating too much junk food while we're there.

This fast food unit has had me pondering the role of a mother even more than I already have been. A big part of why I want to stay home is to have the time to cook healthy meals for my family. It's really hard to do after working all day. On the days that I'm not working, I use naptime to cook, or at least prepare, and clean the house. When I work, I don't have that option. I can keep the baby entertained in the kitchen while I cook for a while, but not for too long. As she gets older, I'm looking for ways for her to help, but for now she's still too little. She's interested in helping, which is a start, but for now she's better at stirring the food out of the bowl than keeping it in.

As I talk about food, fast food, and obesity with my students, the recurring theme we come back to over and over is that it's the responsibility of parents to teach healthy eating habits and provide healthy food. I couldn't agree more, but at the same time, we live in a society that doesn't seem to value this. Dinner and dinnertime used to be sacred. A time for individuals to stop and come together as families. Last week, Adam only got home from work before 9:30 once. I don't want Lily to grow up in a eat-on-the-run family, and it seems sometimes like the only way I'm going to accomplish that is to be home.

At a Crossroads

For the past few years I've felt like I'm at a crossroads in my life. I guess this is a normal feeling for women in our world. It's that feeling of being torn in two directions, one toward my family, the other toward my career.

I have ambition. That's not a problem. I've always been ambitious, wanting to be the best at what I do and move up to the next level. I want to move up the so-called ladder. I'm not sure where I want to get to, but I know I want to get out of the trenches and move up to something else. Maybe as a principal, maybe more district level. Maybe get a Ph.D and move into research or policy. There are all kinds of possibilities out there.

On the other hand, I want to be my daughter's mom. I want to be home with her. I want to take her to the park and the zoo. I want to go to Mommy and Me classes and sing songs and play games. I want to watch her walk and talk and learn to run and jump.

Last night I told Adam that I want to be a stay-at-home mom. I've been considering an opportunity to work with my principal in an internship style administrative credential program next year. The program sounds great, and the opportunity is outstanding, but I feel like it's not the right time for me. As much as I want to move up that career ladder, the ladder can wait. Lily can't. I can put my advancement on hold for 5 years and pick back up close to where I leave off, but I can't put Lily on hold. I can't regain what I'll miss if I'm not around.

I just hope it's the right decision.

Welcome

I've tried having blogs before, and it's never really worked out. This time I hope to change that.

First, let me introduce myself.

I'm a part-time working mom, part-time SAHM with a beautiful 1 year old daughter. There's a part of me that loves being a part of both worlds, but also a part of me that feels like a bit of an outsider in both. I love that I can take my daughter to the park two mornings each week, but sad that more people there know her than me because she's usually there with her babysitter. I love that I still get to work and be part of the culture at the high school where I work, but since I'm not here all the time, and rushing out the door at the end of the day, I miss a lot of the fun activities that make teaching worthwhile.

I have a wonderful, if sometimes exasperating, husband (aren't they all!) who probably won't be much of a figure here since he's very private and probably won't want to be mentioned much. We'll see how I make that work.

In my work life I teach 12th grade English at a small charter school designed to get underprivileged kids into college. Far from an easy task. I spent much of today lecturing them about how they need to take advantage of even little bits of down time at home to get homework and reading done. We'll see if that sinks in. I have my doubts. I love teaching, but it's exhausting. Especially the grading. I don't like grading at all. I'm actually applying for an administrative credential program to start next year. We'll see how that goes. I think it might be a good change for me.

I'm not really sure what form this blog will take. I kept thinking that maybe in order to have a successful blog I need to have some sort of focus, a catch if you will, something to set me apart from everyone else. For now though, I think my goal is just to write every day. I like to write, but find that in my life now I have little opportunity to just put my thoughts down. Instead I usually just lecture poor Adam until he can't take it anymore (especially when it's in the middle of a football game).

Here goes nothing...